I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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