He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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