dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
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