he was CRYING into my vagina
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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