I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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