oh god the rape fog is back!
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Even my vagina gasped.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
