Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
