I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
