Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
