this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
