I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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