How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
I'm eating all of the evidence.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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