He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
