how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
