He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
