I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Let's get the cat blown out
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Randomize
