You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
