dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
