Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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