Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
We just shotgunned beers for America
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
