My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
