Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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