and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
