Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
