I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Randomize
