I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
