Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
