So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
