It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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