I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
