do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
