shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
