i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
