does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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