She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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