I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
