69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
My vagina just clenched in fear
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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