I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
