i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
