i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
