Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Randomize
