Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
