I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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