Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
im calling her cock vulture from now on
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
