good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
