i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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