at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
