I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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