I feel like abortions should bother me more
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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