I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
be right there i have to get my cape
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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