watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
